a warped view

I don't really go in big for resolutions. I've never been an avid resolution setter. As someone said on twitter the other day, if it's important enough to you then you just do it, you don't wait for a special day to start being better. However this year I've decided to make some resolutions. This year I turn 35 and when I reflect on my life in my 30s I see that its been a massive period of growth and change for me. I've become more willing to be myself, found my own style, lost friends and made new ones and lost some again. This year I embark on a new adventure. On the 29th of January I begin my journey to becoming a Nutritional Medicine practitioner, Naturopath and Herbalist. I'm not sure about the herbs and stuff yet, my main focus is on learning the science behind nutrition, how our bodies work and how we can heal ourselves by making choices about what we put in our mouths. It seemed a natural step after my journey from 100.5kgs to the 74.5kgs I am now ...

Things I am grateful for today 1. Tomorrow we fly to Bali 2. Erin 3. My mum for so many reasons but today in particular for looking after our kids while we're away 4. A fabulous group of friends who are helping out while we're in Bali 5. Music 6. That I can lay on my bed and look out the window at the trees and the sky 7. That I've been blessed by so many wonderful opportunities this year 8. Hugs from small people 9. Smiles 10. The words "I love you" What are you grateful for today?

Things I am grateful for Tomorrow we celebrate my mum's 60th birthday and I am so grateful that she is still alive, in my life, my best friend, a wonderful nanna to my kids, there for me when I need her and someone that I respect and enjoy spending time with. While our genetic family might sometimes let us down, we have an amazing group of chosen family that are amazing people and I love them more than anything. Even though I might not see some of them very often, my life is full of wonderful people that make me happy. I own many beautiful, awesome brooches Now that the HSP and I have passports, he has become very interested in cheap overseas airfares We have almost completely finished the back to school shopping and no one died Even though we have no airconditioner at the moment, when it is hot we have access to a car with aircon and can go to places that have aircon. Lots of families don't have this. Music. It fills me with bliss. Someone cared and was thoughtful e...

Sometime ago there was a regular thing on Tuesdays where we all posted ten things we were grateful for that day. I haven't done it for a while and thought it was probably time for more gratitude so Tuesdays will now be known as Ten Tuesday and will be full of thanks. Feel free to join in in the comments section, on your own blog (put the link in the comments so we can all read), share on twitter with the hash tag #10tuesday or jot them down in a notebook (so bespoke!) I am grateful that... 1. I am surrounded by people I love and that love me 2. this year I might finally figure out what I want to be when I grow up 3. I have been given the opportunity to go on an amazing adventure 4. people believe in me 5. big splashes of rain just fell on my head 6. I have an overseas holiday to count down to 7. I had a lovely dinner with my family tonight 8. I have both Bahen & Co. and Gabriel chocolates hidden away in my house for when I need them 9. I have people that I can talk ...

short term goals for this month and why the 2010 day eight can be found here I'm not particularly good at setting goals. I struggle with that whole SMART concept; Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Timely... sounds like hard work to me! I tend to be more of a dreamer and schemer than a goal setter (you're stunned I know). I suppose though that I do have a few short term goals, not that I would really call them that. So here is my list SHIT I NEED TO DO (aka Goals) Make sure I take my anti depressants and my dexamphetamines EVERY day Blog Attempt to read a book now that I have the new concentration drugs Try to get to bed at a reasonable time, at least most nights of the week See, talk to, and hug my friends more Tell (and show) my family every day that I love them I'm not sure about the Specific, Measurable and Timely parts, but I'm pretty sure I've got attainable and Relevant covered :)

a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you The 2010 day seven post can be found here This is a post that takes little thinking about. There is only one possible answer to what has the biggest impact on me, and that is my kids! How they are doing, if they are happy, what's going on in their lives, all impact on me, my mood, my day, my life. If I'm feeling sad, these three smiling faces can cheer me up and make me happy once again. They have an impact on every decision I make.  oh, and there's this guy too of course...

a habit that you wish you didn’t have the 2010 Day Four post can be found here where to start?! I have quite a few bad habits that I wish I didn't have and I can think of a few that other people wish I didn't have as well! My worst two habits are biting my nails and eating when I'm bored. I had stopped biting my nails for a while but I always go back to it when I'm feeling particularly anxious. Apparently the new drugs for my ADHD will help me get the eating thing under control though so that'll be one less bad habit. My mum would probably consider my swearing a bad habit (despite the fact that I love it) and she probably would also like me to be slightly less argumentative. The HSP would have a pretty long list of bad habits/annoying things I do including forgetting the washing is in the washing machine (sometimes several times), singing loudly and out of tune, not paying attention to what we're watching and then asking lots of questions ab...

I have always been fiercely protective of the people I love, sometimes to my own detriment, sometimes more than those people want me to be. I have never let my sex, my age, my role or my place in the world stop my for standing up for someone. This is particularly true of my mum. She is a strong, independent, smart, wonderful woman, my role model in most things. Growing up there was mostly just her and me. I say that but we had a very close relationship with my grandparents, my cousin lived with us for almost 10 years and my (half) sister from my dad's second marriage spent an inordinate amount of time with us, but in my mind and my heart, when I think of my childhood I think of the two of us together against the world. She raised me to be strong, to stand up for what is right and just, to treat all people equally, to be kind, compassionate and giving and that above all else, family comes first. She also taught me that friends can be our family as much as those we are bound to by ...

So this morning I got a completely random email from someone I used to consider a good friend (we had a thing, I was a bitch, it was a little bit awkward but he's pretty awesome). Apparently he is a reader of my blog and I didn't even know it! He wanted to know why I hadn't blogged in two months. A valid question, one I ask myself every day. My answer was a very pragmatic one, I currently have two jobs, do the admin for our business, study at uni and have to manage a house full of two and four legged mess makers! But I know there's more to it than that. I had started to feel a bit like I was always complaining on my blog, that I made it seem like my life was terrible because I tend to write more freely when I'm in a bad mental place. That couldn't be further from the truth. I have a wonderful life full of amazing people. I am very lucky to live in a country that allows me freedom of speech, access to health care and education for little to no cost (but let...

My middle child, master 10 (almost 11) is a beautiful boy. He is sensitive, polite, caring, intelligent, he cares about other people and how they feel, he notices things others wouldn't and he often compliments me that I look beautiful. He likes to read, he's good at maths, he enjoys cooking and he is a fantastic distance runner. He is, of course, not perfect and he and his sister (miss 13) are very good at stirring each other up! He knows just the buttons to push to send her into full princess bitch face mode. He has the regular issues that 10 year old boys have. Sometimes he gets a bit silly, sometimes he doesn't listen, he doesn't really like doing chores and he has issues at school. My master 10 however is different from most other 10 year old boys. My master 10 was expelled from school when he was in grade 2, at the age of 7. It is not something either of us is proud of. It is not a stigma I would choose to have attached to my child but it is the reality we mus...

Earlier today I reached my breaking point. It felt ugly and harsh and pointy and sharp. I wrote about it. I sent all the children to their rooms. I tried not to cry. Then I boxed it all up, tied a neat ribbon on top of it and put it away in the-cupboard-of-things-we-do-not-speak-of-that-exists-only-in-my-mind. I gathered the children together, I spoke to them about how I was feeling (in an age appropriate manner of course) and I set some new rules into place. I explained to them that I want them to treasure and value each other, that as brothers and sisters they could ask for no one more loyal in their corner, that they should be kind and generous and helpful to one another. I explained to them that we are all responsible for the kind of house we live in. I told them that I want to live in a happy, loving, uncluttered, tidy house. That I find it hard to cope when there is mess everywhere. I told them I loved them. They all listened, nodding their heads in appropriate places, saying ...

nicknames and why I have them My very first nickname was given to me by my cousin Maria's, at the time boyfriend, now husband Robert. For some reason he has always called my Tif-a billy or just Billy. I'm not really sure how or why he started calling me this as I was 4 or 5 at the time. I came down to Perth with my Nanna for a visit and we stayed at my Aunty Dot's (Maria's Mum). At the time Maria was living at her Mum's house and studying to be a teacher (or had just started teaching, I'm not sure which one) and Robert was around often visiting. I always get a warm feeling inside to this say when he still calls me Billy, even at thirty it still makes me smile that he cared enough about me to give me a special name that has stuck with me for so long. RObert and MAria are the only ones who use the nickname and I think its gives us a special sort of connection. I have been called lots of the nicknames you would expect over the years, Tif, Tiff, Tiffy, Tiffo and the...

IMG_6846 Originally uploaded by tiffanyff another picture of you with your friends So this time around I am posting a picture of my absolutely 4 favourite people in the WHOLE world. We already talked about one of them, my husband shaped person and best friend, Alan. He is amazing and wonderful and strong and intelligent and supportive and caring and everything I could ask for in a husband, partner in crime and best friend. While our marriage is not perfect (no one's is) we are perfect for each other. We fit together like a jigsaw puzzle and I love him like a fat kid loves cake! My other 3 favorite people in the world are my three kids, Miss 12, Master 9 (almost 10) and Master 4 (otherwise known as base jumping jack or crash bandicoot). They are all hilariously funny, they crack me up everyday and each have an amazing sense of humour. They never fail to amaze me with how smart they are and how caring and wonderful. They are growing into amazing human beings before my eyes and I genu...